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We're all mad here.
Young. Independent. Moody. Strong spirited.
College Student in SoCal. Dealing with the same shit, different day.
I want a Disney themed wedding!
(Source: idreamweddings, via fuckyeahdisneyland)
(Source: uglypeopleproblems, via ssstormy)
Now you’re just somebody that I used to know.
It feels like i dont have anything to say about this anymore, but something inside of me is telling me there is. Maybe I was waiting for a moment for you to screw up, only because I was afraid. And you cant blame me for being afraid. All I wanted to see was that you were being sincere about everything you were saying to me. It was so hard to believe what you were telling me because of the guard I put up again. Like I said before, one week you’ll feel totally in love with me and then the next week those feelings wont be there. Maybe i was wrong and you really didn’t feel like that way but you had me convinced that it was. You didn’t seem interested in our conversation anymore, always so short. Never asked me how I was. Never asked to hang out anymore. I always had to keep conversation going and I’d just sit there…hoping that once you’d try to have a conversation with me. That you would put an effort back. And lastly, just ignoring me instead of talking to me about how you feel. You wait till I blow up and call it quits and then you tell me how you feel. You said you were trying to work on that, but i got the same old you. And here we are now. Maybe the reason youre so caught up with the “old me” is because the old me was so passive about this stupid love triangle. I let you have your way with it because I was waiting in hopes for you to pick me. Waiting for you to realize “shes the one.” That was dumb for me to ever think that but thats how messed up my mind and emotions were. I was so in love with you I didnt care how much it hurt me. Ive done things that made you angry, that make you second guess me. Youre afraid of what im capable of. Youre afraid of my “secrets”, the ones that I dont have. If I wanted to be wasting my time somewhere else i wouldnt have had you around. I wouldnt have fought for you. I wouldnt have been arond and lingered for the past 4 years. But now im done. I’ve said that a million times before, yes. But im promising myself that this thing thats supposedly called “love” between us, is over. Its time to move on. It was amazing and new when it wasnt completely messy. You were my first everything and maybe you’re right. Thats probably what im holding on to. The fact that you were first. Time to let go of all that and grow up. Im holding on to too many memories. I need to face the truth. I’ll always have a soft spot for you in my heart but theres no room for anymore heartbreak. You’ve shattered it one too many times already. More than you should have. I deserve better. And im sorry that this entire thing is an attack towards you, but i just have a lot of anger and disappointment with all this. 4 years of emotions bottled up and now lost. You’ve completely turned my world around, bad and good. You’ve taught me so much and despite all the bad, im glad you were apart of my life. Im glad that it was me that you got to sit next to 6 years ago. I wish you the best in what you do in life and you find what makes you happy. You have so much to offer the world, dont give up on yourself. And like i said before, maybe we can actually be friends in a couple years or so. Only time will tell.
(Source: shimmycocopuffsss, via nikknak)
I was having a bad day and he surprised me with this. Simple gestures go a long way :) I’m so lucky to be with a gentleman.
(via fashionfever)
eh.
Break ups can be messy sometimes. Especially when theres mutual friends involved. I hate that i cant be somewhere if you’re already there. It fucking sucks and im not here trying to “claim” my friends or anything. I don’t want to make it hard on you nor do i want there to be a feeling of awkwardness. But i wish we were past this stage of hate, disappointment, regret, whatever rough patch it may be. Just the possibility of friendship.
